By the Rev. Elisabeth Shelton Hartwell
Revised Common Lectionary reflection, Proper 22, Year B
October 6, 2024
Key verse: Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate. -Mark 10:9
Dear fellow preachers. At my church I just wrapped up a sermon series on “Things in the Bible That Really Bug Us.” Our text from Mark 10:2-16 was not included in the series, but it might well have been. In the first part of this text, Jesus speaks about divorce, a very difficult topic that has impacted so many families. Above all, our first concern must be to share God’s Word with sensitivity and compassion. It is critical to preach this text with consideration for the complexity of human relationships, in this case especially marriage. And as a community of God’s people, we want to do our best to steward healthy relationships of all types.
When I read our text, my first question is how the first part, vv. 2-12, relates to the second part, vv. 14-16? What does Jesus’ teaching about divorce have to do with his insistence that children be brought to him and his assertion that the kingdom of God belongs to children? It would be easy for us to deal only with one section of this pericope while ignoring the other. But the Gospel of Mark places Jesus’ teachings about divorce and children side by side for a reason, and the lectionary dictates we should read them together.
I suppose there are numerous ways we could interpret this, but it seems to me that Jesus is emphasizing the mutuality of intimate human relationships and the need to protect the dignity of his society’s most vulnerable members: women and children. Those who ask him whether it is lawful for a man to divorce his wife want to know whether it is permissible. But Jesus is not interested in what is permissible so much as he is in what is ethical.
In Jesus’ society, when a man divorced his wife, she was thrust into a very vulnerable position, and Jesus wants his listeners to understand that neither partner in a marriage is expendable. When two people get married, they leave their homes and are bonded together in a new and special way. Therefore, the termination of a marriage should not be taken lightly: it is the breaking of a sacred bond between two people. In like manner, children are also not expendable. They should be adored and provided for.
Given the sensitive nature of the topic at hand, and the multiple ways it has undoubtedly impacted the lives of our congregants, here are some possible avenues our sermons might take:
- Explore what happens when two people marry. In some Christian traditions, marriage is a sacrament, while in others it is a covenant. What exactly do partners commit to when they marry? And what is the difference between taking that commitment lightly and divorcing easily on the one hand, and on the other recognizing that the marital bond is irrevocably broken, and divorce is necessary?
- How might we, in our churches, support married couples and families with children? Families come in all shapes and sizes, and some bonds are biological while others are chosen. How do we support the full gamut of familial relationships? In like manner, how do we offer support to those in our congregation who are separated, divorced, single, or widowed?
- If Jesus’ overarching concern is to protect and honor those who are vulnerable, how can we follow his lead? There are lots of forms this might take, from advocacy to offering support during a crisis or transition, to the ability to simply be present and empathize.
My fellow preachers, when Jesus speaks about divorce and children in this lesson, his intent is not so much to consider what is permissible or lawful, but what is ethical, what supports intimate relationships, and what honors human dignity. When it comes to marriage and divorce, these are complicated topics to consider and there are no simple, pat answers. We must approach this text with humility, with imagination, and with empathy and compassion.
In Worship
Look out into your congregation and consider who participates in worship and to whom you are preaching. What are their experiences with family? Some are married, others are separated or divorced, some are single, and others are widowed. Some of your congregants have children and grandchildren and others do not. And some of your congregants have loving, close relationships with their families while others are estranged from family
As you lead worship, be mindful of all the different family structures and experiences your congregants come from. Instead of offering pat answers and simplistic solutions to questions about marriage, divorce, and children, try to empathize with your congregants and ask meaningful questions.
Worship with Youth
The youth in your congregation are experiencing so many changes in their lives as they bridge the gap between childhood and adulthood. One area they are likely growing in are their relationships. They are learning how to be independent and how to relate to others, and they are starting to develop close relationships, some platonic and others romantic. Worship can provide an opportunity to explore the mutual respect that is necessary in all relationships. Share about the respect Jesus had for everyone, and consider how they can show respect for others, even when it proves difficult to do so.
Worship with Children
Just as Jesus lifts up how important children are, tell the children in your congregation how special each of them is and how blessed your church is to have them as part of the church family. In my own Presbyterian tradition, when children are baptized the whole congregation promises to raise and nurture them in the faith. Regardless of whether your congregation or tradition makes this promise, you can tell the children how much the grownups care about them and will support them as they continue to grow and learn. Church should be a place of love, warmth, and acceptance for children. Consider how you can make it so.
Previous reflections for Proper 22, Year B:
2018 – Praise that leads to action
2015 – Hard hearts, little children, and the reign of God
2012 – It’s complicated
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